Tag Archives: music

The Blarg No. 87: Morgxn

Full disclosure, I’m writing this on a rainy Sunday night, watching Battlestar Galactica, so if things get dark, well…

Anyway, the annual “Best of Phoenix” edition of The New Times came out this past week, and Limited Engagement was again named Best Cultural Podcast. It’s the second year in a row, and it’s really fantastic. It’s great promotion, it’s great validation from peers in the community, and it means we’re doing something right. If anyone recalls reading my musings on this last year, however, I couldn’t just accept the positivity of the award, or accept that this was, well, a form of acceptance. I’ve been out on the fringes for so long that, to borrow from Groucho Marx, I wouldn’t want to be in a club that would have me as a member.

I was talking to the creator of Tapestry Comics, Tyler Button, for an upcoming edition of LE, and the phrase “impostor syndrome” came up in discussion. I think this is something I’ve suffered from for a long time. I’ve been knocking at the door of the artistic establishment for so long that when the door is opened, I hesitate to go in. I’m doing nothing but work I’m proud of, but if anyone else recognizes it as something with merit, my initial impulse is to disbelieve them. It’s impossible for me to feel that I belong. Maybe that’s good. Maybe that serves to forestall complacency and foster continued grown and experimentation. It’s sure as shit fucking exhausting, though.

I’m working on just taking the praise, affirmation, awards, what have you, at face value. It’s a long road. In all seriousness, though, an immense thank you to the staff of The New Times.

A piece of business I want to get out of the way: on the last LE, I mentioned that we’d changed hosting providers for all Hoot n Waddle podcasts. It saved us a little bit of money, and it allowed me to do what I’ve been wanting to for a while, which is manage all of our podcasts under one account. Simultaneously, we’ve begun in earnest to promote our Patreon account as a way to support Hoot n Waddle in the long term. We have a lot of expenses related to both the podcasts and our publishing endeavors, and the monthly support model is something that will help us out immensely. Since these two things coincided, and I needed to change out all of the files on our website, I made the decision to make the first year of LE available to Patreon supporters only. At this point, that’s only 11 of the now 87 episodes of the podcast (it would be 12 if it weren’t for the infamous “Lost Episode”), and I honestly think that’s fair. What this means is that, going forward, episodes will be available for two years prior to being available only for patrons at the $5/month level. These episodes are no longer available on the website, and over the next month, they will be removed from podcast providers as well. If you would like to voice a dissenting opinion, you’re welcome to do so by email or social media.

On this edition of Limited Engagement, musician and songwriter Morgxn discusses redefining masculinity, starting out in Nashville, the influence the loss of his father had over the making of his new album, Vital, and how he came to record a cover of The Cure classic, “Boys Don’t Cry”

Best,
Jared

Listen to LE 87 – Morgxn

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LE 86: Matthew Slusser

Freaking the fuck out.

Guys, what do you do? I realize that’s an odd start out of the gate with no context, but right now, I feel like an odd start out of the gate with no context. What am I talking about? I don’t even really know.

If you’ve been following along on this journey—fuck that. I hate things being described as journeys, but I also equally hate people describing something as a path or a road, because beyond being cliche, it all sounds so planned and linear. Life is nothing if not not linear. I mean, sure, time moves in one direction—forward, but the distance traveled between A and B is never a straightforward thing. At least not in my experience. A is the starting point and B is the end point, but from A there is often a misstep backwards into a steaming shit-pile of Z, then rolling down a steep embankment through thistles to come to a dazed and moaning stop in F, then at last certain you’ve found a shortcut to B but winding up stuck for ten years in H… you get the idea.

I don’t like roller coasters—never have—but it feels like I got on one a few years ago that’s been on a steady climb ever since, and now I’m just kind of trying not to look for the crest and inevitable free fall. It can’t be far off. Except that it can be, and it might never be this terrifying drop I’m anticipating—maybe things will just level off, even out, and everything will be great. That’s not the way I function, though. I wish it were, but it’s not. I don’t have that practiced, self-assured way of thinking. As soon as things start to go well, I go straight to disaster prep mode. I guess you could say I’m a negativity prepper.

So back to the opening question, what do you do? How do you cope? How do you keep yourself from spiraling into an overwhelming pit of depression and anxiety that is not only self-destructive, but makes you difficult for other people to deal with as well?

As I write this, we, Janell and I, are just two days out from the launch party for our first book from Hoot n Waddle, Chris Danowski’s DOGSEAR. I should be filled with joy and a sense of accomplishment—this is exactly the kind of thing that I wanted to be doing with my life—but all I can do is focus on the “what if.” What if no one shows up? What if no one buys the book? What if I just fuck the whole thing up in some grand and fiery way?

I’ve begun having panic attacks. That’s new. I’ve always had problems with anxiety, but it was all in my head. Now, there are these physical manifestations. My breathing gets sharp and shallow, I get a little light headed, I begin to feel like I need to scream, but can’t. I’m sort of going through a little of that now. I need to get grounded and enjoy all of this in the moment—we’re publishing a fucking book! That’s freaking amazing! I don’t know how to be happy about it, though.

The launch is this Saturday. I’m writing this Thursday night so that I don’t have to stress about writing The Blarg and posting the new Limited Engagement and updating all the various things that need to be updated on top of the launch. I guess you’ll have to wait to hear about how I handled the launch and everything after until the next Blarg.

On this edition of Limited Engagement, Matthew Slusser discusses podcasting, Henry Rollins, the end of his band Phantom Party, and much more. Be sure to check out his podcast, Getting Stoked.

Best,
Jared

Listen to LE 86 – Matthew Slusser

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LE 85: Steve Ciolek of The Sidekicks

Well, I took full advantage of the Labor Day weekend—to the point where I actually missed my self-imposed Monday morning deadline. It’s bound to happen from time to time. Once in three years ain’t bad.

In the little bit of time I carve out for myself to read something that isn’t a Hoot n Waddle manuscript submission, I have finally gotten around to reading Bruce Springsteen’s memoir, Born to Run. I’ve had a copy sitting around for a couple of years now, but I kept putting off reading it—likely out of fear that I’d be disappointed. That could still happen, but I’m enjoying it so far. However, I can’t help but compare it to Elvis Costello’s memoir, which came out the same year, and I think that Costello’s has more elegant prose, but Springsteen’s is like his songs—relatively plain spoken, containing flashes of profound insight into the human condition, and a rough yet poignant and pointed working class poetic. Which is why I could not be more upset that he devotes only three measly pages to Nebraska. He spends more time talking about the red light district on a tour stop in Germany in 1980 than he does discussing any of the songs on one of my favorite albums of all time. There’s no question that Nebraska changed my life, so it’d be nice if it got a little more than what amounts to a, Yeah, I recorded it on four track Tascam, it was kind of a game changer for me in my songwriting, but whatevs—now on to Born in the USA, the moneymaker!

Anyway, there’s a lot going on right now, so I’m just going to run down the list real quick:

Wednesday, I’ll be down at Fair Trade Cafe recording the one year anniversary edition of Chatterbox for later posting as a Chatterpod, and I’ll be telling a story, too (details here). You can pick up a copy by going to our Square shop. You can also now pre-order our 2nd book, Reading T. S. Eliot to a Bird by David Chorlton.

This Friday, I’ll be down reading on Roosevelt Row for the launch of the new Rinky Dink series (details here).

Then, September 15th is the big launch of Hoot n Waddle’s first book, Chris Danowski’s DOGSEAR (details here). If you’re in Phoenix on that date, and you can make it, that would be amazing.

I’ll be co-hosting two new podcasts that’ll be available soon. The first up is called What the Fork?: Exploring The Good Place (Unofficially), which I’m doing with my friend and prior Limited Engagement guest, Jason Keil. Next is an artist catalog discussion called Album Infinitum, and that will feature myself and a number of guests going through an artist’s discography one album at a time. I don’t have start dates yet for either show, but they’ll both be up by the end of the year, with What the Fork? likely premiering before The Good Place season three premier.

Lastly, there’s another podcast, but it’s Patreon-only podcast. It’s called Apocalyptic Popsicle, and it’s a straightforward review show. Sometimes it’ll be me solo, and sometimes, when I’m lucky, it’ll have my partner in life and Hoot n Waddle, Janell. The podcast will be available to any patron who supports Hoot n Waddle with a donation of $5 or more per month, which you can do by going here. We’ll have the first episode up no later than the end of this month.

On the latest episode of LE, I talk to Steve Ciolek, frontman of The Sidekicks, about touring, songwriting, recording with storied producer John Agnello, working with an artist-centric record label, and much more. The Sidekicks’ new album, Happiness Hours, is available now from Epitaph, and you can catch them live on their fall tour, which kicks off on 9/13, and includes a stop in Phoenix at The Rebel Lounge on 9/26.

As always, you can listen to the podcast on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Stitcher, our website, and a number of other podcast sites as well.

I think that’s plenty for now.

Best,

Jared

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The Blarg No. 84: Brandon Kellum

Getting Ready for Launch

We are undeniably living in interesting times. In any way you want to interpret that phrase—good and bad. Well, I take that back, because I don’t know what your situation is. Maybe for you, everything is shit right now. If it is, I’m sorry, I hope things get better for you. I’m trying to get away from the inclusive you and the royal we. It creates distance and only serves to generalize the specific. You probably don’t care, and here I’m using “you” correctly and on purpose, but I do.

Let’s start over.

I’m living through interesting times. Good and bad. It’s like a crazy-ass roller coaster. I hate roller coasters. I’m coming to grips, though, with the reality that this is just how my brain works. Some of the forces are external—how can I not absorb all the awfulness? I’ve had to severely limit my exposure to the news. I already can’t watch the news (with the exception of the highly condensed “Last Week Tonight”), I’m beginning to not be able to take listening to the news either (shout out to my local NPR station, KJZZ—when I do listen, I listen to you). I’m making myself read the news, because it’s important to stay informed, but it’s really hard, especially if your a sensitive person such as myself, to not just shut it all off. Vote. Vote your conscience.

Politics aside, it’s still interesting. This podcast continues to grow (thank you all so much for listening and spreading the word about this podcast), Hoot n Waddle is beginning to take off (you can pre-order our first book, DOGSEAR by Chris Danowski, at http://hootnwaddle.com/dogsear), we’ve (and here I’m referring to myself and Janell and Hoot n Waddle, so I’m using “we’ve” on purpose) got a lot of projects in the works. I’m constantly busy working on things I love. That’s the good part of the interesting times.

However, I’m also freaking out. What do I mean by that? Well, as I’ve discussed, I’m a very depressive person. It doesn’t take much to send me into a spiral. Also, and this seems to be more recent, I’m constantly feeling anxious, and I’ve begun to have actual anxiety and panic attacks (there must be a difference—it feels like there’s a difference…). Also, I’ve started having anger issues. Not physical or violent anger, but it doesn’t take much to trigger a negative emotional response. My patience is almost nonexistent. Also, suddenly certain Springsteen songs (“The River,” an acoustic version of “Thunder Road,” “One Step Up”) make me well up every time I hear them. I don’t know. It sucks. I’m certain I need therapy, but I can’t seem to make myself take the leap.

I had wanted to use this edition of The Blarg to promote the DOGSEAR book launch. I wound up writing all this instead. I’m going to leave it all in. If you’re interested in details about the book launch, visit the Hoot n Waddle Facebook page. All the details are there.

About this edition of Limited Engagement:

A founding member and lead vocalist of the Phoenix, Arizona based hardcore punk band American Standards, Brandon Kellum is also a regular contributor to YabYum Music + Arts, as well as the founder of the nonprofit organization, Heart Shaped Canvas. On this episode, Brandon discusses his musical odyssey, songwriting, life on the road, and much more. American Standards’ latest single, “Weep,” is available on Bandcamp, as is their latest album, the critically lauded Anti-Melody. The band was recently featured as one of the 12 bands to watch out for this year by Alternative Press, and they’ll be playing The Nile in Mesa, AZ on September 3rd.

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The Blarg No. 79: Joey Burns of Calexico

I spend an awful lot of time expecting things to fall apart. That’s just my go-to assumption. It’s not a crippling thing, it doesn’t stop me from doing stuff, but it’s always there in the background, this nagging feeling that I’m going to wake up one morning and everything I’ve worked on will just disappear—and as I pile on projects and they continue to meet with (always unexpected) success, encouragement, and support, that nagging feeling becomes more insistent, manifesting itself in a palpable sense of anxiety that I can’t seem to shake. When it was just Limited Engagement, and it hadn’t gotten much attention yet, this was a pretty mild feeling, but now the podcast has gotten some attention, as well as an increased audience and a higher profile. Then, add to that the launch of Hoot n Waddle, more podcasts, the subsequent launch of our publishing program, the upcoming releases of our first books… I’m about ready to explode and cover everyone within a decent-sized radius in hot, dripping, messy neuroses.

Apologies for that image.

My strategy thus far has been to just keep my head down and do the work, but I am freaking the fuck out. I don’t know what it’s going to take for me to get comfortable, and I don’t know that I ever will. Maybe that’s a good thing, I don’t know. It certainly keeps me working hard and pushing myself to always improve, to grow, to never get stale or stagnate. On the other hand, I recognize that it can also make me very difficult to be around, and I don’t feel like I can ever really slow down or take a break. I’ve heard there’s something called a happy medium, but I haven’t found it. Sometimes it’s all too exhausting, and I find myself getting deeply depressed and discouraged by tiny, tiny things. I try to push that all down as much as possible, but I can see it seeping out, and I know myself well enough to recognize that if I’m noticing it, then I’m not fooling anyone.

Ugh.

I suppose the upside to all that anxiety is that I don’t take any measure of success, or any opportunities to do cool shit for granted. Case in point, this opportunity I had to talk to Joey Burns.

Joey Burns is a leader and founding member (with the brilliant drummer, John Convertino) of one of the most exciting, talented, and critically lauded bands on the planet, Calexico. On this edition of the podcast, Joey discusses the band’s Tucson roots, what the environment brings to the music, fostering a spirit of collaboration, speaks very candidly about Calexico’s creative process, and much more. Calexico is currently on tour in support of their new album, The Thread That Keeps Us (easily one of the best albums of the year thus far), and if you have the chance to see them live, don’t hesitate to do so.

Also on the show, a brief preview of an upcoming conversation with Philip Haldiman, one of the stars of The Room, which will have a screening at FilmBar on Friday, June 15th at 10 pm.

Listen to LE 79 – Joey Burns of Calexico

Best,

Jared

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The Blarg No. 77: Jason Keil (plus a mini talk w/Dan Hull)

I had two conversations this weekend that made me think about religion. Specifically my personal relationship with religion, which, to be perfectly honest, isn’t that great.

One, with poet Katie Manning, made me consider religion and religious imagery as it appears in my writing, which is not often, but it does. That conversation will go up soon. The other conversation was with friend and neighbor Dan Hull, a short one that you can hear at the beginning of this edition of the show.

Dan has a film premiering on May 25th at The Newton called Bad Buddhist, and he invited me over to watch it with him. A recording of a fantastic one man show he staged at Space 55 a few years ago, the film mines veins of love, ritual, imperfection, and man’s inhumanity to man. Serious stuff, but it’s very funny as well, and the Buddhist lens through which everything is filtered serves to somehow make the film universally relatable in its specificity. The Buddhist rituals that Dan incorporates into the show connected me to memories of donning a yarmulke and saying the prayers as a kid. The ritual and the language of that came back to me instantly, and in Hebrew, too, and it’s easily been 20 years since I participated in anything remotely Jewish from a spiritual standpoint. Cultural and social Jewishness is inescapably ingrained in my personality makeup, but I was surprised, especially as a non-spiritual person, to find myself sort of missing the ritual, and it went a long way towards explaining a lot of my need for organization and routine. It’s something I’m going to have to really think about for a while, which I believe speaks directly to how powerful the film is. You should go see it on the 25th at 7 PM. If you can’t make it to the screening, visit the Bad Buddhist website and contact Dan for the Vimeo link.

Surprisingly, this weaves perfectly into my conversation with writer Jason Keil. Jason is a frequent contributor to The New Times, as well as other publications, and I highly recommend checking out his work. I connected with Jason via Twitter, and it did not take long for us to connect on a primally nerdy level. Jason is the sort of person that I can talk to endlessly about pop culture, so it was really hard to keep this conversation on the rails—which I swear I try to do despite all the evidence to the contrary. In addition to all the shared interests, Jason is just a really amazingly nice guy, and he’s so genuinely enthusiastic and in awe of the fact that he gets to do something he loves and is passionate about and in some way contribute to the pop culture fabric, that I want as many people to read his work and support him as possible. Check out Jason’s website, and be sure to follow all of his social media accounts.

One last quick note, a little bit of business, Hoot N Waddle is officially open for manuscript submissions. We’re currently accepting Poetry, Fiction, and Creative Non-Fiction. You can visit the Hoot N Waddle site, or go directly to our Submittable page to read our guidelines.

Best,
Jared

Listen to LE 77 – Jason Keil (plus a mini talk w/Dan Hull)

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The Blarg No. 71: Doug Bale

I can tell you exactly when and where I first heard the music of Doug Bale. It was Thursday, May 30th, 2013 at The Most of Lit Lounge at the Scottsdale Museum of Contemporary Art. I went because my uncle, Scott Krause, was part of the lineup which also included Tania Katan, Leslie Barton and Where Are All the Buffalo. It was a great show, but I remember being particularly struck by Doug’s sound, which managed to sound like music I loved without being derivative. I really dug it. I dug Doug.

So, when I started this podcast, Doug was one of the first people I wanted to have on. For reasons that will become clear when you listen to our conversation, it was not a good time for Doug to be on the show. I didn’t know that then, though, and then Doug just kind of disappeared. Well, he didn’t really disappear, but he might as well have, having first scooted to California, and then exiling himself in Apache Junction. Well, maybe it wasn’t exile, and my apologies to the residents of Apache Junction, but it sounds like exile to me.

When I heard that Doug had a new music project he was working on, I was ecstatic. I was like, Doug, there’s no excuse now, do the show, and he said, let’s do it, so here you go. It’s one of the strangest, best conversations I’ve had on this show, and it illustrates why I leave so much in all the time. I know some listeners would prefer I cut things down, keep it around an hour, and that would actually probably help me out as far as making the show more commercial, but that would ruin the journey. We had a really serious conversation about some deep shit, but to get there, we also had to joke around about lemons and DJ Boboli, and go off on a long R.E.M. tangent in order to get to the deep stuff.

Quick note: Doug wanted me to let you all know the name of the book he was referring to on why we read is called All Things Shining.

Another quick note: Doug gave me permission to put one of his new Flighty Tronys tracks at the end of the show, so be sure to listen all the way to the end. The new tracks are great!

Doug Bale is an artist and musician. His artwork has been featured in galleries around Phoenix, and you should absolutely check out his Society 6 page and buy some. His new musical project, Flighty Tronys has released its first EP (available on Bandcamp, Google Play Music, iTunes, and Spotify), and you should get the companion t-shirt. Oh, and go listen to Mergatron while you’re at it. Basically, support Doug. He’s awesome.

Listen to LE 71 – Doug Bale

Best,
Jared

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